Connection First

I've been working on keeping a more positive perspective, thinking about
intention and manifesting, and my daughters had heard me talking to my husband about "positive thinking" and such for some time, and one day Sarah asked me about it. I told her that I was trying to hold onto happy thoughts, so I could stay calm when I was frustrated or angry.

A few days later, when Mermaid and Fairy were having some debate, I ended up taking Mermaid on my lap for a moment. (Fairy didn't want the connection at that time, she was distracted by something else.) I validated her for a moment, and then she said, "I don't have any happy thoughts, I only have angry thoughts." I said, "Would you like me to help you think of some happy thoughts?" and she said yes. So I talked about her and Fairy on the beach, playing in the water, sunshine, seagulls... and Fairy came over and sat with us too to hear about happy Mermaid and Fairy playing together.

The next day, they were arguing and I offered my lap and they both wanted to sit with me (one on each knee is our habit). I validated them for a couple moments, and then Mermaid said, "Okay, I have happy thoughts now." Fairy said in a very upset voice, "I have ANGRY thoughts." I said, "Maybe Mermaid will tell you her happy thoughts? Mermaid, do you want to do that?" Mermaid sat back down, and took Fairy's hand, and said, "We're holding hands on the beach, and there's sunshine, and we're playing in the water..." and Fairy said, "And I chase the birds?" very excitedly. It was a paraphrase of what I had verbalized the day before. It was so wonderful to see the mood change. They still didn't have resolution for what they were arguing over, but we were able to figure it out after that.

The power of connection is amazing.